Let me start by saying I have never been a big reader. I didn’t know I was dyslexic until I was 17 and assumed books just weren’t my thing. TV wasn’t really my thing either; I liked experiencing life, playing, and being outside as a child. It was only when I changed schools aged almost 12, that I realised my reading skills were much lower than my peers.
When I was 17 I started reading with passion. Prior to this I had found some escapism in Jilly Cooper’s, ‘Riders’ series, but it wasn’t until I was in the 6th form that I discovered good books and, influenced by my mother and sister, I read many of John Irving’s books. Cider House Rules and the World According to Garp were particular favourites. I was always drawn to alternative books and I loved Haruki Murakami’s, especially Kafka on the Shore which tells the tale of parallel lives and the magic as these lives intertwine.
I have always relied on friends to recommend books; however, it was the discovery of spiritual books that touched my soul in a very new way. The first book I read came to me in the most unusual yet perfectly orchestrated way.
When I was 26, I found myself in LA with my dying father. I had just spent a week with him in a cancer treatment center in Mexico, which was both beautiful and traumatic. It was the most time I had spent with him, and there was a keenness from both of us to repair a difficult relationship. When we arrived in LA, I settled him into our hotel room and said I was popping to the bar downstairs. There was a feeling of reckless freedom, and the lyrics of Bran van 3000, “Drinking in LA” were going around in my mind.
“So, I ask you what the hell am I doing drinking in L.A. at twenty-six?”
While in the bar I met 2 young men, and we started chatting. Soon after meeting them, we discovered we had so much in common, and in particular, I felt like I knew one of the guys from times before. There were some freaky strange things, like one of them had my soon-to-be fiancé’s first name, and the other his middle name. One of them had my birthday, and one of them my boyfriend’s. There was this instant connection, and I felt like these were my people, so I didn’t hesitate to join them at an all-night party in Hollywood. (something we should all do once!)
Walking home in the early hours I was confused about where my life was heading. I knew my father wouldn’t have long to live, and I was on the edge of getting engaged and committing to a life back in London. I decided to let fate decide, and I played one of my favourite games (if ex happens then I do X, if not I do Y) and sure enough the signs told me to head back to London (after a short trip to San Francisco to see friends).
Before I left LA, one of the guys handed me a slip of paper, it said Siddhartha by Herman Hesse, and I slipped it into my passport case and said goodbye, trusting I had made the right choice.
When I returned home, I got engaged; shortly after, my dad died. At some point, I discovered the slip of paper, and I brought the book, and read it; as promised it was an amazing read. The story of Siddhartha is one of self-discovery and enlightenment. He is a boy who leaves his home to search for meaning, he finds the Gautama Buddha, and at this point he chooses to follow his own path, hoping that through this discovery of self, he will find enlightenment. It is at the end of his life, that Siddhartha while sitting peacefully by the river reaches enlightenment.
This book touched my soul, the story resonating deeply, and while I wasn’t yet ready to start my journey, this book awoke something inside me.
Fast forward a decade and my spiritual journey began in earnest. While on this path, I was gifted the name VasuDevi from my teacher Shakti Durga, and I found many other amazing books that supported my journey. However, during lockdown with time on my hands, I looked for something to read or reread and I found Siddhartha, barely remembering the details (it had been almost 2 decades and a lot of parties later) and I began reading. The richness of the tale did not escape me this time, and when I reached the part where Siddhartha meets the river man, I started crying, his name is Vasu Dev (the male version of my name).
This book was no accident, my spiritual path was no accident, and my life choices were no accident.
For worrying my dying father, (who according to my mum, kept phoning home to see if she had heard from me; it was long before we had mobiles that worked abroad) I am truly sorry, but I will never regret that night in LA, for the amazing synchronicities that have shaped my life. Sometimes the signs are right there and we just need to trust.
If you are a keen spiritual aspirant and want to learn more, having guidance can be helpful. There is so much information, so much guidance on socials, and so many books to pick from, that it can feel overwhelming. I have always found personal recommendations and working with amazingly embodied teachers to be hugely beneficial; there is nothing like being seen by somebody who understands the path you are on or interested in.
I am running a 6-week spiritual mentoring program in 2024. For more details head over to my course info page.
Here are some other books I highly recommend, each of which weaves the spiritual with devotional, and share lessons that are as relevant today as when they were written.
The Autobiography of a Yogi, Paramahansa Yogananda
This is a story of miracles and awakening. It touches the heart and is a beautiful read, telling the story of a deeply devotional child who became a Hindu monk.
Empowering Relationships Shakti Durga
An essential tool in how to understand relationships, and our impact on them from a multi-dimensional point of view. Truly empowering, this was my go-to tool, for many years, while mastering self-love and moving out of power dynamics.
Kali: The Black Goddess of Dakshineswar
Elizabeth U. Harding
I have spent the last 3.5 years chanting to Kali every day and last year I was gifted this amazing book by a dear friend. For anyone wanting to understand true devotion to Mother Kali this is a must-read. It touched my heart profoundly. And I can not wait to visit Kalighat Kali Temple in Kolkata.
I am I : Saraswathi Ma
This book came to me as if by magic. I found it on my bookshelf and had no idea where it came from. When I opened it, the exact guidance I needed was right there and this happened every time I felt called to pick the book up; the next page was exactly what I needed. Beautifully written and full of such wisdom.
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Laura Hamblyn Holistic Healer 