Being able to process disappointment effectively is an important life skill
One we are not always taught
Many of our parents or elders have not modeled this well for us
Perhaps we were ignore or punished when we made mistakes as a child
We therefore learn that this is how we process disappointment when we are older
The more people that can process their own emotions and model this, the healthier our world will be.
It can be really hard to break generational patterns, unconscious patterns, and if you need support to do this, I would recommend working with a therapist to look at these patterns and find healthy ways to change them.
Not only will your life improve, but you will be doing a great service for the world.
We need more cycle breakers
We need better role models for our kids
The world is changing at a rapid pace and it is our job to do the work, to give our kids a better world to live in
One with more openness, more compassion, more emotional intelligence, a kinder, more wholesome world.
1 – Acknowledge it
Feel your feelings, all your feelings are valid, and its ok to be disappointed, to feel deflated, to know your dream has not played out right now
2- Get the feeling out of your system
- Cry
- Talk about it – share your feelings with a good friend who can listen
- Run it out
- Find a safe place to shout / bang / hit a pillow
3 – Understand what is underneath the feeling
What did this dream mean to you
If any beliefs around being good enough come up remind yourself you are already good enough. Remember you are not a disappointment. No person is a disappointment. Disappointment is a feeling
4 – Have compassion for yourself
Self-compassion is key to resilience, when we have self-compassion, we are more likely to learn, and do better next time. Fact
5 – Remember there is an opportunity in every set back
When we can evaluate situations, we can learn from them, and learning and growing is key